Nom's 2011 Last Minute Gift Guide

Everyone loves gift giving....when they get their shopping done as early as I do. (those presents were purchased, wrapped and under my decorated tree before Dec 1st....I know its not a game but I win at Christmas...well I at least level up)

So while save for a few small last minute things, I am done with Christams. However, I realize I am in a minority and most of you will spend this last week before the holiday clawing bitches in the eye at the mall. This is of course unless you are Jewish in which case TODAY you will be clawing bitches in the eye at the mall because Chanukah starts tonight so move yo ass!

So in light of this pending holiday here are some last minute gift ideas for the foodies in your life:


For Your Friend Who Loves Good Food And Wants To Learn To Cook:

Martha Stewart's Cooking School: Brilliant foundation book that covers all the basics of cooking.






For Your Friend Who Is….Long Story Short….On The $20 Gift List

Ikea Coffee Accessories http://www.ikea.com/us/en/catalog/products/70149125/

For Your Friend Who Is….Long Story Short….On The $20 Gift List….and Kathy Lee
Wine Tasting Sampler: This is cool. You get six bottles of wine, can taste a few different vintages then buy big-kid sized bottles of the ones you like

http://www.tastingroom.com/

For Your Friend Who Likes To Hit The Sauce In Style
A Bottle Of Quality Bourbon and Whisky Stones

http://www.amazon.com/Teroforma-1220-Whisky-Stones/dp/B002GZX2DE

For Your Friend Who’s Like….Whatever
S’Well Water Bottles
http://swellbottle.com/shop-now



For Your Friend You Secretly Hate
Julie & Julia By Julie Powell: Your friend is really a freinamy so why not reward her by giving her a book she’ll think is right up her alley but is really a chronicling of the worlds most self-indulgent blogger/home cook’s attempts to garner fame off the greatness of Mrs. Julia Child by writing a mind-numbing detailed account of her chronic temper tantrums and boring life stories….what can you say. You saw it and it made you think of her.
http://www.amazon.com/Julie-Julia-Recipes-Apartment-Kitchen/dp/031610969X

Top Five Ways To Host A Party Like It's Yo Job!!!

I love magazines (who doesn’t) but I hate clutter so I try as routinely as possible to go through my old magazines and remove any items I want to keep (for my Recipe, fashion and design books respectively) then discard the rest. Well I was flipping through a Bon Appetit on entertaining and read an article by The Foodist called My (Highly Debatable) Rules of Entertaining. So in light of my (I think) successful diner party this past week I thought I should write a list of my rules for entertaining:

1. You Are Only As Good As The Company You Keep. I’m not too big of a fan of mantras, the utterance of which does tend to suggest considerable time in support groups, or an overly enthusiastic amount of attention is paid to one’s self. However even I have a few. And one of them is “life it too short to eat bad food, drink bad wine, read bad books and hang out with people who suck” (yes I did just quote myself) I try to think of this simple phrase whenever I am in the diner-party planning stage. As a rule then only those who can contribute lively conversation and appreciate good eats can earn a seat at my table and by setting my quality of guest as high as I do, a delicious menu follows suit. It’s the least I can do for the guests who will inevitably make my evening a success. Plus passion follows passion; I love to surround myself with awesome people and therefore people I want to treat right. I should also note that adventurous eaters are nice, but not necessary; However, picky eaters will not be tolerated. No one wants to slave over an elaborate meal only to have one or more of their guests inform them that they cannot eat XY or Z because even though they have never had it “they don’t like it”.

2. Hire a Cruise Director: Everyone means well. Remember that when your pots are boiling over and there are now three apex markers in the kitchen where you are trying to keep the tasty in meal who’s delicious doesn’t materialize till the fourth quarter. Your friends love you! And to some of them, the idea that they are sitting by idly while you work your ass off over a hot stove makes them crazy. (for the record I am not one of those people and will keep planted on my fanny while you work). And as a practical matter, people are coming to the door, need to be greeted, want to thank you for inviting them etc etc. This is why I ask at least one of my friends to come about an hour early to help me prep. They have the important job of getting coats, ushering people out of my kitchen and beginning the boozing process (I have found that even the most helpful of friends desire to elevate your taxing chores is easily put in check with a stiff cocktail)

2.5: Hire a Cruise Director: This is also the code name I put in my notebook when I’m planning everything out for the cocktail I serve before dinner. It serves an invaluable social function (see above) as well as it wets the whistle and prepares the palette for the Armageddon of tasty it’s about to experience.

3. It’s Your Party: but please don’t cry even if you want to. It’s unbecoming. Do feel free to steer conversations, declare start and finish times and tell people when it’s time to quit hittin the sauce.

4. Write This Shit Down: I am basically a moron and cannot remember anything ever. So I always make a “plan” for my parties. I write down a slew of recipe ideas, note which are easy/hard/time consuming/ etc and then make my final decisions as to what to serve. From that I generate my grocery list. It seems simple but taking the two seconds to write this down helps insure nothing is forgotten, not purchased, etc.

5. Have Fun: if hosting parties stresses you out don’t do it! I always approach every function I host with the same attitude of utter relaxation: if things go wrong so what, if the dinner is crappy, whatevs. If someone has a shit fit or gets into a fight who cares. I took the time to surround myself with people who love to eat good food but they love me more and no matter what everyone is going to have something to talk about the next day, even if it is because my subpar cooking ended up forcefully pushed into someone elses face during post- hours devours fisticuffs. S’all good

Happy Birthday to Me Bitches

So yours truly has just turned 26, and as a way of staving off the pending quarter-life crisis that one associates with turning 4 years shy of 30 I threw a party.

Now I know what you’re thinking (mostly because everyone I knew asked me this) if it’s your birthday why are you doing all the work? Well reader, I decided that my birthday is about more than just turning another year older: it’s about celebrating me and what better way to celebrate me and all I bring to the world then by letting me show off my mad-skillz in the kitchen.

The menu:
Apple, Rosemerry Beacon Braciole with Stout Gravy
Pomegranate Brussels Sprouts
Roasted potatoes
Devils food cake with 7-minute frosting.

Let’s start with the Braciole. I make it a habit of routinely breaking the “don’t make something new for a party” rule and this party was no exception. And I wanted to take it one step further and make up the recipe too. I have to say I was pleased as punch with the result though so as always my reckless party planning went without a hitch.

Stout Braciole
2 lb flank steak
1 cup bread crumbs
4 pieces beacon
1 green apple
2 sprigs rosemary
I bottle of Guinness
2 carrots
1 onion
2 stalks of celery
3 cloves of garlic, peeled and whole
Beef stock
- Pre-heat oven to 350
- In a Dutch Oven, cook the beacon on med-low until the beacon is crispy and to render out the fat. Remove beacon and add to a bowl with diced apple, breadcrumbs and 1 sprig of chopped rosemary. (remove Dutch Oven from meat until you use it so it doesn’t smoke).
- Butterfly the flank steak (ie split in half, leaving an inch at the end of the steak so you can open it like a book.

- Stuff the barciole with the stuffing, and roll like a jelly role. Tie with cotton kitchen twine.
- Heat the Dutch Oven over med, and add a few tablespoons of extra-virgin olive oil to the pan along with the reserved beacon fat. (this is to give the meat a little more of that beacon taste but it certainly could be skipped if you wanted to prepare the braciole up to this point a day ahead. Then just brown in olive oil) Brown the braciole on all sides (between a minute or two per side). Remove
- In the same oven, cook the onion, carrots and celery till softened and onions are translucent (4 mins) then add garlic and cook 1 more minute.
- Add the bottle of Stout and about a cup of beef stock, season with salt and pepper, and boil briefly (5 mins). Add the braciole and cover.
- Place in oven for 1 hour, basting half way. Then uncover, baste and cook 30 minutes more.
- Remove and slice steak. Cook down sauce over high for 5-10 minutes and then puree.
- Serve.
Side note: my future husband Josh Groban was on Live! With Kelly Ripa and they made braised short ribs in Stout. Copycats….marriage is off Mr. Groban

Pomegranate Brussels Sprouts
- So this recipe was sortof a Bobby Flay recipe in that I saw a recipe by Bobby Flay that sounded delicious decided to make it, and then when it presented me with two substantial problems I made it completely different. First it asked for a pomegranate molasses which I had no idea how to locate nor did I care to so I opted to make a vinaigrette instead. Then I went to roast the Brussels and found I had no more room so I cooked them in a pan. The result is nothing like the original but was pretty tasty. My only grip with it was I went to Fitzies to get the Brussels and I could only get them in small containers. The result was unnecessarily priced and I had no control over the size of the sprouts which ranged from the size of a normal Brussels sprout to the size of a small cabbage so they were not cooked as evenly as I wanted.
Vinaigrette: Halve a pomegranate and remove seeds. Reserve juice from this process and whisk into it Champagne Vinegar and salt and pepper. Then add EVOO until you have a vinaigrette.
Take Brussels sprouts and slice in half. Brown lightly in a large pan, and then add a cup or so of water and cover, steaming until cooked through and soft. Remove from heat and toss with vinaigrette, pomegranate seeds and hazelnuts.

All and all the party was quite a success: god food, good friends and four bottles of wine….the Niezabitowski recipe for success

Secrets, Lies and Power-outages

Dear Readers,
I think I’m having one of those crises typical of most bloggers. I never find the motivation to blog, so why do I do it. This Generation Y crisis of faith has recently taken a whole of yours truly who consistently feels guilt over leaving you (both of you) hanging with my recent adventures.
In an attempt to rectify my past mistakes I have both a few excuses and a promise of reperation.
First, the excuses. My dad has a saying, excuses are like assholes; everybody has one. And while this is true let me offer you mine. I feel like November never happened at all. First, and I don’t know how many of you caught this one the news/are locals and heard about the massive black-outs we CT residents had after an unseasonal snow storm just before Halloween. Well we all went to a Halloween party the day before, and in the middle of the “snow storm” that I was convinced wouldn’t be a big deal we all lost power. And I mean all of us. The whole damn state. We left our party local and drove home the next morning, and it look like someone had bombed our hometown. Well needless to say we spent a good 10 days or so without heat, power, cell phone charging, enjoying Chinese food (literally the only show in town) trying not to go Jack Nickolson a la The Shining on each other, and listening to CL&P press conferences like the desperate wrecks we were. I went back to work late in the week rather then early like I usually do to make up for lost days, then began our annual anniversary sale which meant I worked almost everyday till 8. I spent countless hours with delightful customers (not sarcasm) and ending each day with a glass of champagne (eat it P-Diddy). When life resumed it’s normal pace the following week I was shocked to discover that half of November was done (where did a week of my life go? Oh yeah I spent it huddled around a fire place freezing my Bo Jangles off). Next thing I knew it was Thanksgiving, which was claimed by my mother this year so I didn’t make anything….so sorry no stories there besides it was delicious.
So while this is merely an excuse for leaving you high and dry on the culinary front, it is nevertheless my unfortunate truth.
Now on to the positive: It is almost my birthday soon!! And despite likely having a quarter life crisis, I will also be serving a hell of a diner to my lovely friends.
Menu:
Apple, beacon, rosemary Braciole with Stout gravy
Roasted potatoes (I think)
Homemade birthday cake (and I am kindof hell bent on making it pink)

Plus, I also plan on hosting my first holiday party. Partially (ok mostly) because I have been in school, the Christmas season has not been so much about celebration as it has been about outlines, finals and tears. But now that I am a few months school free (I should get a chip) I am actually in the Christmas spirit and therefore plan to show off the decorations my aunt and I pain over by hosting a Yuletide Fete.
So there are going to be at least two blogs this month. It’s better than nothing.
Cheers
Alex

Breakin The Law....Breakin the Law

Top Ten Food Crimes (My list)
Inspired by Chow's Top Ten Food Crimes, I have endevered to create my own Top Ten Food Crimes Punishable by Death:

- Undertiping: We can treat this under a three strikes rule because let’s be honest, we have all been too sloshed, too distracted or too bad at math to have not done this at least once. However, repeat offenders must be punished by death. Or they have to eat a meal after their waiter spit in it.

- Well Done Steak: like steak?! why not try it with all the flavor cooked out. I don’t fault someone their life choices but I will never understand you well-done folks. Sorry. Punishment: before I serve you I will remark that I cooked it till it was done then cooked in 30 minutes more…..just for you

- People that won’t cook a steak well-done: (This person is real) OK we get it! You like steak medium. Well-done steak tastes like raw-hide. But who the hell are you to tell others they are doing something the “wrong way”. You don’t have to eat it. So get off your high horse and put the steak back on the grill you pretentious ass. Punishment: your steak gets cooked well too…ha

- Garlic salt: what did your food ever do to you. Punishement: death

- Mayonnaise on a burger: un really? Is this Canada? And does a meal that is delicious BECAUSE it celebrates the natural juiciness of fatty beef product sometimes smothered in cheese really need another 300 calories of fat globbed on top? Punishement: Mayonnaise-boarding

- White Beans in Mexican Food: ever since I read Alex Kapronous’s book Sound Bite, and he mentions getting Mexican with white beans I have been scared. Punishment: I’ll smash all your Franz Ferdinand CD’s

- Bad Cookies: and someone explain to me why the worst cookies always come from someone who claims to make “awesome cookies”. Awesome my ass. It has half a chocolate chip in it and it can double as a hockey puck. Punishment: death

- Everything Bagels Without Salt: so in other words, Almost Everythings. Like corn fields and incest, the farther you are from any metropolitan area, the more likely this is. Punishment: Flogging with a log of Phili Cream cheese in a sock

- Calling a Sub a Grinder: a Hoogie, Sub, Submarine, Hero, Wedge….all acceptable. A grinder? That is something you get in a strip club. Punishment: Grinder from Dick Cheney. And if you ask underage children to engage in Simsburys Annual Grinder Sale? Then you join the list of registered foodie offenders

- Calling Hamburger, Hamburg: Starting just shy of Connecticut’s norther boarder and suddenly you can order Hamburg in your calzones or buy it by the pound in the grocery store, which is strange because IT”S STILL IN GERMANY!!! Once upon a time someone wondered what you called a hamburger before it was formed and figured Hamburg! I am a genius! And so for generations chop meat was so named. Look I know it,s the north and I know having your head up your ass is a great way to keep your ears warm but here is a basic lesson: When it’s ground meat i’ts Hamburger, when it’s formed its a hamburger patty and when it’s the second largest city in Germany it’s Hamburg. Punishment: a slap in the face for every second of my life you waste arguing with me about this idiocy

artistic credit to Lauren "P-nut" Niezabitowski for my erotic dancing sandwich

How Bout Them Apples Party

So I’m not sure why it’s taken me an eon to write this entry about my dinner party but I regret to inform you that this post is almost two weeks late. My friends and I decided that with the pending Halloween holiday that we all wanted to throw different themed parties. Mine, we decided should be first and it was going to be a Single-Man party. Not a everyone had to be a single man though that could be a good theme, but rather a theme that revolved around the film A Single Man directed by Tom Ford. Haven’t seen it? Go now.
Well, I went for a walk in the park behind my house and made quite a discovery. You know how parks have those roofed picnic areas? Well Stratton Forrest has one with a fire place! I know! So suffice to say my theme party had lost its theme and become an outdoor picnic by fireplace.
Every day I checked the weather and every day Sunday promised to be sunny and bright. Every day that is but the night before my party when I got the super fun news that it was going to rain. Party was moving inside.
Then a certain friend had pretty much the shittiest week ever. I debated making Xanax an hours devours.
Well I’m pleased to report that despite these minor set-backs the party was a success. Let’s hear it for the healing properties of friends and alcohol.
The unofficial food-theme was apples. Here is the menu:
Apple-cheddar Palmiers
Roast Chicken with Apple-Sage-Sourdough Stuffing, and Balsamic Onions
Sweet Potato Casserole (See thanksgiving)
Fried Apple Rings with Blue cheese sauce
Hard Apple Cider
And finally, Apple Tart Titan

First things first. The Apple Tart Titan. Let me just say that I routinely have a problem with things that need to be flipped out of a pan. So I made the wise executive decision to make something with caramel that needed to be flipped out of a pan before a party. Suffice to say I was shitting a brick the whole time I was making it. Well it came out, except for a few apples which were easily removed and put back on the tart, which was baller by the way. Not too sweet considering it’s apple and caramel, and definitely something I would make again.
Next the Chicken. Quick Recipe:
Unpack and rinse the chicken, season the cavity with salt and pepper. Quick trick with this. I like to put salt and pepper in a small prep bowl before I season so I can move the chicken around while seasoning without worrying about any cross contamination. Take a stick of butter and cut it in half. Using your index finger, separate the skin of the chicken breast from the meat and insert one half of the butter with a sprig of rosemary. In essence you are giving the chicken what looks like a breast implant made out of butter. Place in a roasting pan with halved onions (cut the onion at both “pointy” ends to remove skin and make sure the onion has a flat bottom to stand on). I consult Better Homes and Gardens New Cookbook for cooking time and temperature. About half way through cooking, when you open the oven to baste the bird, drizzle a few tablespoons of balsamic vinegar on the onions.
The onions are what I like to call a “people pleaser”. I have never met anyone….ever….who didn’t like these onions. So making them is like dousing your recipes in truffle oil. It’s kindof a cheap ploy to get people to like your food. Trust me on this.
Also, I made them and in my haste to cut my bird I forgot to put them out. So until someone said, “wait! Where are the onions?” they didn’t make it onto the table. So note two” Serve them!!!
Lastly the Palmiers. Take two apples (I tried this first with Macoun but Granny Smith works better), peel them, and then grate on a box grater. Place the grated apple in a strainer over a bowl and press with a fork to remove some of the moisture. Let the apple sit for about then minutes and press again. Then add about half a cup of grated cheddar cheese. Roll out one package of frozen, thawed puff pastry. Sprinkle the apple mixture onto the puff pastry leaving a little at each short end. Roll each side in to the center forming what looks like a scroll. Cut the roll into slices about an inch thick and place on their side on a cookie sheet. Bake according to the package (about 15 minutes at 400 degrees)
My guests seemed to like the food and the only real suggestion (as always) was that I needed to make more food. So I hope you enjoy the recipes and take from my party crisis the important lesson that no diner party goes exactly as planned but can still go well and be fun no matter how much goes wrong.

What To Get The Man Who Has Everything? French Dinner! That's What

Everyone has a few of those things, those things that make them truely happy. Prefect example: my friend and I went to Kent, CT on a mini-day-cation and we were both starving, drawn like flesh eating zombies to the alluring smell of dinner food into a small, cheap and delightful little resterant in the center of town. And on the menu was a hotdog, with Kraut, and fries. And have you ever had something that is just exactly what you wanted right then and there? Is there anything better? No.

Well one of these things, these perfect culinary delights, these exactly what I ordered foods for my Dad is Alsation Apple Tart from Lutece. He literally talked about this dessert for years until my very determined mother tracked it down a year or two ago. It was then made the crowning moment of an epic Prime Rib dinner a year ago on my Dad's birthday. See that blog post, and feel free to be jealous that I am not YOUR child.

Well this year we made it again, only it was paired with a Poulet Provencal masterfully crafted by my sister.

Yeah he's spoiled.....but he's a good Dad so I guess he deserves it.

Here is the recipe:
Alsatian Apple Tart